Paul's Military Awards

Last Saturday night we went to Paul's Military Unit's Christmas party. I'm not sure why they had it in the the first week of November but the food was good. We were kept up all night by drunk phone calls from soldiers but I guess that was to be expected. That night Paul was awarded the Alaska Commendation Medal pictured here. This was awarded to him for his service as the Non-Commisioned Officer in charge of the Joint Operation Center for the Alaska Air and Army Guard for the past year. They really appreciated the things he was able to put into place while he was there and the work that he did. He ended that job and went back to his regular job at Customs and Border Protection October 1st.

Another recent addtion to his uniform which he is very proud of it the German Marksmanship award and German Jump Wings pictured here. The wings are the ones  above the red bar and the Marksmanship award is the gold medalion with the braid. In order to get the Jump Wings Paul had to jump out of an airplane with a German jumpmaster telling them when to jump. For the Marksmanship, Paul had to shoot at a certain level of proficency with the Germans to be awarded it. There was a unit from Germany up here several months ago doing joint training, so he was able to do this then. Paul served a 2 year mission for our church in Germany and loves all things German so these mean a lot to him.

My Latest Creation

For the last week I've been a little obsessed with finishing this dress and hat for a friend who is getting ready to have a baby. It took me about a week and I really think it turned out beautifully. I got the pattern off the Crochet Garden website. I've been wanting to try something from there for a very long time as her patterns are gorgeous!    This one is called the Juliet dress. It didn't have sleeves so those I made up on my own. The hat turned out slightly different as I didn't put as much wire into it, but I love it as is as it looks like more of a bonnet. This is the back of the hat.

 And this is the front of the hat. I'm now working on a dress (same pattern) for Reagan. She is desperately waiting for it. Hm... I wonder if my neices would like one for Christmas?

Ghosts for V's

Last week one of the letters that Daniel was working on was the letter V. As he was writing them he said there were ghosts in the V's and proceeded to draw them. Here is what he drew.

 I really didn't see it until I looked at it upside down. Take another look at this ghosts. He drew them upside down and they actually look like ghosts! For him to draw anything spontaneously is huge for him. And for them to actually look like what he was drawing was an added bonus.

The fact that it was drawn upside down, well I'm not sure what to make of that. The week before last he wrote his name on the chalkboard backwards and upside down with no effort at all. I couldn't even begin to do that. Maybe it has something to do with him wanting to do the opposite of everything in his school work. He wants to read all his long vowels as short vowels, not because he doesn't know how to read them but just because he wants to do everything opposite right now.

Raising a Child with Special Needs

I've been looking over the fence lately at the seemingly greener pastures. I know. I shouldn't do it. But let me give you a picture of what last Saturday night was like for me.
There was a brownie and chili cook off at the church. Paul was getting ready to start working a 2 week stint of the Midnight shift so I let him stay home. The kids and I went by ourselves. This frequently happens as Paul is usually working or gone for work/training etc. I love to cook and even if I do say so myself, I'm a pretty good cook. So I was excited to compete. We arrived there and entered our food and walked around.
It was decorated in a western theme and what did my son spy immediately? A stick horse. He was in heaven. But wait a minute here, go back two sentences before this. "A stick horse." One solitary horse for many children... Yeah, you can imagine. All the other kids were sharing pretty well. They also had 3 cowboy hats and a lot of the kids were content with those. Daniel however couldn't handle that horse being out of his hands or out of sight for very long. He fell apart screaming multiple times. The family that was going to sit with us got up and left. At one point I took him out to the foyer and was holding him as he was kicking and screaming and he peed on me. Yep, you read that right my 5 year old peed on me.
I should have left at that point. I really should have. But those brownies and the chili were dinner and I really wanted to compete. I went in and got the kids some chili and some kool-aid. They refused the chili but were excited about the kool-aid as they don't get that at our house. It of course was red and was spilled everywhere. I finally gave in and let them have brownies. Couldn't get much worse. We were eating alone, no one would come talk to us.

My Sweet Cowboy

Later in the evening someone did come up and talk to me for a couple of minutes and when I tried to tell her about my lovely night I was having, her response was- "Enjoy it. This is the best time of your life, it just gets worse when they are teenagers." Definitely NOT what I needed or wanted to hear at that point in my night.

To top the night off I didn't place anywhere in the top contenders of the chili or the brownies. I was so glad to leave and just go home by the end.

I am seriously thinking of swearing off all public functions forever because Daniel just can't handle them. He loves them but they are too stimulating for him and without me being right by his side the entire time it's chaos. Now someone should have known better than to have only one stick horse. That was a recipe for disaster without having a child with special needs there. And when I saw how he was going to act I should have just left. But sometimes being a parent of a child with special needs you just need some time to feel like an adult and feel social. It's very isolating as people don't understand when your child all of a sudden has a major meltdown, they don't want to get involved nor do they want to be around it if they don't have to.  Hence the family that got up and left for another table. I can't blame them. But it doesn't stop me from feeling friendless, silently crying for help, depressed, and generally unhappy with the people around me. Do I want to stay that way? No. Do I keep picking up and trying again. Yes. Feeling isolated is a VERY common problem for parents and siblings of children with special needs.

I recently read a blog post from one of my favorite blogs, Dandelion Wishes. In it she quotes people from a foster parenting message board she is on and how isolated they feel as foster parents. It was a real eye opener for me to find that here was a whole other set of parents who were experiencing a whole lot of the same feelings and frustrations. Maybe I just need to hang out with some Foster parents instead...  But check out Jane's blog Dandelion Wishes anyway. She is a Homeschooling, Catholic, Adoptive and Foster Mother and I promise some of her posts will make you cry and others will cause you to have hope for humanity like this one about a modern every day hero .

One of my hero's is my sister in law Tiffany. Her boys both have Fragile X Syndrome and Autism. You should check out her blog as well which is located in the column on the right Making Life Work with Disabilities . Her patience with her boys and the way she talks about them is inspiring to me.

Some days life with the doctors visits, therapies, school, and well just life get overwhelming. But I am trying to find moments for me and to enjoy the journey. Gordon B. Hinckley, (former president of our church) said, "Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." 

This should be my new life motto. I should make a sign to hang in my house to remind me like the one I made last year that says "Grant me patience to deal with my Blessings".

I'm not really writing this to complain. Please know that. I'm writing this more to get it out of my system and document what this experience is like and maybe help someone else out there know that they aren't alone. And so that the next time you see a child falling apart in a tantrum your first thought isn't; it's the parent's bad parenting, and you might offer to help. (Personally when I see another child falling apart, my first thought is, "Thank you Heavenly Father that it isn't mine this time!" I'm bad I know.)

Learning Farm

One of the requirements with the particular Homeschool Charter school that Daniel is enrolled in is that they spend 9 hours of face time with a certified teacher in a class or tutoring of some sort during the year. This year for our 9 hours we have been going to the Learning Farm here in Anchorage and learning about animals and plants.

It has really made me miss Frying Pan Park back in Virginia. They are free. Luckily the school is paying for Daniel as it's about $20 a trip. Mom and Dad you should do something like this. Look at all the money you'd make!

 

 Last week Reagan got to come with us. She is usally at preschool during this time but it had been canceled and she was really excited.

 This isn't a great picture but there is a bird on Daniel's head. We got there a couple minutes late so I didn't hear what kind of bird it was but Daniel did really well letting it fly on his head. It also flew on my head several times as I was the tallest person in the room. It's a bit disconcerting to say the least...

This is a root cellar they had just finished digging. They had kids stand on top and one of the Mom's at the bottom to show just how tall it is.

Daniel's favorite part by far was getting to ride the pony. I've been seriously considering Hippotherapy (horseback riding) for him. He would LOVE it. If only there were more hours in the day!

See these worms? They are actually catipillars. They played with them for awhile until they fed them to this guy...

 Daniel certainly has no fear of animals. He didn't mind the Iguana at all.

 Puppies!

 Reagan was a bit nervous of the horses at first but eventually she got used to them and would pet them. This Shetland Pony was her favorite, probably because he was a lot smaller.

 They got to milk the goats which they were pretty psyched about. Later that particular day they also made butter and carded wool and spun it with a drop spindle.

We have to watch Daniel with the animals carefully but he loves every minute of it and he's gotten to see and play with a lot of animals you wouldn't normally find at a farm. He can't wait until our next trip.

Hair Bows

Recently I had an oppurtunity to learn how to make hair bows. I don't wear them much but I have a daughter who does and after learning I'll never buy another one again. They are SO easy. All you need is a needle and thread and a hot glue gun, and of course the flower, ribbon beads etc you want to make them out of. This isn't the best picture but it's the ones I made that night. Don't be suprised if one finds it's way into a Christmas package coming to you.  

New clothes

Recently we got a box of new clothes from Grandma Lois. As you can see they were a big hit.

 Reagan had to immediately put some of them on. My kids think new clothes must mean it's Christmas. They get SO excited.

 And here is a picture that should have been posted long ago... Sorry Mom. Reagan in her Princess dress that Grandma Lyman made for her. It actually sparkles!